Summer Vacation

If we're quiet this month it's mainly because we're all traveling home to see families. Eric and Steven are home alone right now. In the mean time, here is a quote from Shane Claiborne. Happy Summer!

I think the most important question is not what I should give away, because the Scriptures say you can sell everything you have and give it to the poor, but if you don’t have love it’s nothing. So the deepest question around simplicity is about love, and redistribution of resources is only meaningful inasmuch as it’s rooted in love. When we really figure out how to live in the personalism and love of Christ with our neighbor, then that defines what’s enough so that we’re not just driven by an ideology, but by a love relationship to our neighbor.

Holding Breath

I catch myself waiting for things to be more difficult... kind of like "when will the honeymoon be over?" This week Cassie has been gone on a business trip and we've had a guest with us- a college student who needed a place to stay for a few days. Things are just going really well- from my perspective anyway.

I had opportunity to share our endeavor with a friend a few nights ago. She had not heard of our plans before, so I got to witness her first impressions. I'm not sure when I'll stop being surprised at the number of people who have either considered communal living or have talked about it with some close friends. Her reaction was one of interest and optimism. She immediately saw all of the advantages that we have expressed and asked many of the questions we were asking before we moved in. There are a lot more people out there who would consider sharing a home with another family than I'd ever imagined. Who knows, maybe in a few years mortgage brokers and Realtors will stop being shocked when people come to them and say, "We want to buy a house together... no we're not related." :)

First Guest

We are preparing for our first temporary and longer term guests this week. We have a couple of Cassie and Tom's friends stopping in this weekend, and her family coming next weekend. Then, toward the end of May, our summer guest will be moving in. He is an international student who needs a place to live for the summer. We know him from Mt Freedom; he has been attending there and living in their parsonage throughout this school year. So we've been busy getting his room ready for him to move in. Right now it looks a little better than the picture above, but the plan is to get it cleaned out this weekend. I hope he's ready for three little boys. They are especially rowdy today after 2 days of rain and no outside play. Right now they're running laps from the bedroom to the living room and back again. :)

Settling

Unpacking, organizing, teaching new boundaries and expectations to the kids- these activities have consumed my days. So far, only 3 days in, I think I'm surprised by how little the two families see each other. We have quick passing conversations, but really any extended time we've had together hasn't been much more than what we were already intentionally doing before the move.

It has made me think about how we, as suburban Americans, normally just aren't very efficient with the space we have in our homes. We use our bedrooms only for sleeping. We have "guest rooms" that are empty 11 months of the year. We insist on having 1/2 acre lots for our homes to make room for storage barns and extra garages for unnecessary extra stuff when a well organized closet or attic space would work just as well. Personally, I haven't felt crowded or claustrophobic at all, and this house is the same size as many others that only house one family.

A definite advantage, it has been so nice to have four adults to help with things instead of just 2. Four adults means half the yard work, half the cleaning, and half of the responsibility of maintaining a home. And, we all know that mundane chores like dishes and meals are just more fun when you can do them with someone. Eric and Tom are going to rebuild the play-set one of these days, a miserable task alone but kind of fun with a friend. Cassie and I are going to work on menu planning for dinners and financial stuff tonight; normally a task I would be dreading, but not so bad because we're doing it together. So, that's life so far from my perspective.

And, Miss Lottie might have sharper claws, but Harley is definitely louder. He is adjusting in his own I-have-short-dog's-disease-and-I-bark-at-everything kind of way.

Logistics

So for the purpose of record keeping and being transparent with our journey, I'll share about our meeting tonight. We are now less than a week from move in day, and we met together tonight to share concerns, fears, and plans for how things will work logistically. We determined that in the midst of unpacking, painting, cleaning and moving we may not be as diplomatic and understanding about who was supposed to be doing____ and that some forethought might be wise.

We talked about chores. Who was going to be responsible for paying bills, doing dishes, mowing the yard, cleaning bathrooms, vacuuming, cooking meals etc. This was all decided mostly by what things some of us are pickiest about. For example, Eric is a little particular about the dishes- he likes to load the dishwasher as efficiently as possible and dishes in the sink really get to him, so he volunteered to look after dishes in the evening with Tom. We divided up everything else pretty easily because we all have our pet tasks that we enjoy or dislike greatly and our dislikes and likes ended up complimenting each other pretty well.

We talked about our children. How would discipline be handled? Of course, Eric and I will continue to parent as always, but good questions were discussed. For example, Erin is in the bedroom with Elijah for some reason. Tom or Cassie is walking through the living room and sees Micah jump on an unsuspecting Isaiah for no apparent reason. Isaiah consequently gets up and grabs Micah's arm, obviously attempting to bite him. (Very plausible situation by the way unfortunately.) What should Tom or Cassie do? We decided that they could and should intervene in instances where someone has or is about to inflict bodily harm on someone else by making the kids sit in different chairs (or at least separating them) until Eric or I can get there. But all consequences for misbehavior will still be dealt with by mommy or daddy.

We talked about grocery buying. We're still a bit uncertain about this one, and definitely open for adjustments along the way, but we decided that part of the purpose of living in community is to stretch ourselves away from the "what's mine is mine and what's yours is yours" mentality. If we're all being fed well and for the same amount of money or less than what we had previously spent on our families, then does it really matter if I'm drinking milk bought with Crisp money or Fuerst money? Not really. Cassie and I will plan out evening meals in advance, and we'll buy groceries that we need for those meals plus items for lunches and breakfasts. We'll all contribute money to a community fund for groceries and pay for groceries out of that pot. To start off, we will all contribute what we've always spent on groceries monthly. If there is money left over at the end of the month or if we're short, we'll reevaluate then and decide what to do.

We made final decisions (open to revision later of course) on the uses of our space- what rooms for which people and where the guest rooms will be. We've decided on a longer-term guest room upstairs along with Eric and Erin's room and the boys' room, and a short-term guest room downstairs with Tom and Cassie's room. We also talked about making sure that no one feels like they are relegated to one area of the house and talked through our daily routines to get a feel for what others would be doing at certain points in the day and week.

I think that about sums it up. We're all getting really excited but are a bit overwhelmed too. It's hard to pack and move in the middle of a semester when the same amount of school work is still necessary. Life must go on even in the midst of moving, painting, cleaning, packing and unpacking. We'll have pictures of the new house to share soon.